Dad Instincts Single Dad

When Your Daughter Asks “When Will My Privates Start Bleeding?”

As you know, my wife’s been off on a girl’s trip (I renamed Girl’s Camp to Girl’s Trip since there’s no camping involved) and I’m enjoying some time alone with my 4 kids. Last night I was in my room while the 3 older kids had a “sleepover” in one of their rooms. Really they just wanted a chance to play. So, I told them they could stay up a bit later if they were really quiet. I thought they’d last 10 minutes max, but somehow they were quiet the whole time. Who says miracles don’t happen anymore?

At one point my oldest son and daughter came in to see me. My daughter then asked every dad’s favorite question, “When Will My Privates Start Bleeding”?

Talk about being blindsided with a question! What blew me away most was that it seemed to come out of no where. Let’s be honest. I didn’t even know that she at 8 years old already knew that a girl’s private parts would start to bleed. I’m 36 and I’m still trying to figure that all out. Yes, I’m not female, but you get the point.

My initial reaction to the question was to blurt out, “Don’t ask me that question! Ask your mom that question. I just know that if you’re experiencing the joys of being a female, I’m suppose to get and do whatever you want. I don’t know how it actually works.”

What you probably don’t understand is that the Crash Wife and I have an agreement. She takes care of the girl things and I’ll take care of the boy things. This was a direct breach of that agreement and I felt the need to inform my daughter that she’d need to consult her mom because my unwritten contract said I wasn’t required to answer her.

Despite this urge, I somehow sat their silently and I think I asked her some dumb question about why she was asking or something. Stall tactic! I needed to delay things while I processed how I ended up in this position with my wife out of town. Plus, I needed some time to process how I could answer her question. The delay tactic seemed to work pretty well since I replied that it depended on the girl and that she could talk to her mother more about it when she was home. A loving reply while still placing the female talk responsibility firmly with my wife.

The next day I was still chewing on why my daughter would somewhat randomly ask me about Aunt Flo (that’s what we call her in our house). I couldn’t let the topic lie, so I asked her why she was asking me about her private’s bleeding (I did actually explain to her that it’s called a period). She responded, “Oh, we wanted to sneak some snacks for our sleepover and so we needed a way to distract you. So, I just thought to ask you about it.”

Daddy Blog Food Single Dad Video Games

#SuperDad at Chuck E. Cheese’s

For Father’s Day, my wife decided to leave town for about a week. Wasn’t that generous of her? She left 4 beautiful angel children with me for a whole week. Crash Wife is so generous! I feel so lucky to have her make such sacrifices for me.

As you may remember, when the wife is away I go to Chuck E. Cheese’s. I really didn’t plan to make it a tradition when I wrote that post, but it seems like I’ve now officially made it a tradition. I won’t be surprised if the next time that crash wife goes out of town the crash kids ask me, “When are we going to Chuck E. Cheese’s?”
Crash Kid 2 and Chuck E Cheese
The good part is that Chuck E. Cheese’s is fine even with 4 kids. They have the person manning the door and so you can relax and enjoy the time together while the kids run all over.

Chuck E. Cheese’s sent me a Father’s Day pass to be able to go and get some free pizza, drinks and tokens. Plus, they gave me a challenge to teach my kids a lesson in skeeball and basketball. Ok, that’s not how they phrased it. They asked for us to go and have fun competing with our kids. Anyone who knows me understands that I’m hyper competitive and there’s only one person in the world where I don’t mind losing: Crash Wife. I’ll take it easy on the Crash Kids and I’ll make sure they have a good time, but I’ll also make sure I win. It’s just who I am and how I’m made.
Skeeball High Five at Chuck E Cheese
See what I mean in the picture above? He certainly seems like he’s happy (even if I just smoked him in a game of skeeball). My favorite game though has to be the basketball shoot out. Luckily Crash Tennessee Aunt wasn’t there or I’d get smoked by her, but she was no where to be seen. However, I have to admit that Crash Kid #1 is starting to catch up with me. I’m sure a few years down the road he’ll read this post and laugh as he challenges me to a game of something. I figure I’ll just retire by that point.
Beating Crash Kid 1 at Basketball at Chuck E Cheese
I also loved playing Skeeball with Crash Kid #4. It’s so funny watching a 2 year old play skeeball. He can’t score any points since he can’t roll the ball hard enough to get up the ramp into the scoring area so our ticket collection suffers. However, he also gets a bunch of free rolls since half of his rolls don’t make it all the way up the ramp either and roll right back down to him. He has a great time even if it pulls at my heart to not score points on each ball. At least he’s cute doing it.
Barely Big Enough to Play Skeeball at Chuck E Cheese's
While the games were fun, I couldn’t help but let out a big belly laugh when Crash Kid #1 said the following as we were leaving, “I just have to say, that pizza was great!” In fact, he’s been raving about the delicious cheese pizza at Chuck E. Cheese’s ever since. This coming from the kid who doesn’t like to eat anything.
Crash Kid 1 and Chuck E Cheese's Pizza
As part of Father’s Day, Chuck E. Cheese’s is giving dads a chance to win tickets to the 2015 Big Ball Game in Cincinnati (You know the one that can’t be mentioned). All you have to do to enter is to share images and stories about what you love most about being a dad using the hashtag #SuperDad. Plus, I think they’re giving away some free guest passes to Chuck E. Cheese’s as well. Here’s my entry with a picture of Crash Kid #3 making new friends that I tweeted out today.

What a great day with the kids! I even was a real Super Dad since I let Crash Kid #4 bring one of his friends with us as well. Nothing quite like being the cool dad who takes your kids’ friends fun places.